2025: Highlights, Lowlights, and other events

2025

I wasn't sure how well we were going to fare this year.  It seemed like too sci-fi a number to not have some type of apocalyptic event, especially with the US government (and half the voting population) welcoming back a rapist oligarch into the presidency after he was last seen inciting an insurrection against our democracy.  The US continues to sell weapons and run cover for the genocide in Palestine while publicly claiming to be attempting peace/ceasefire negotiations, and has recently begun instigating a war for resources in Venezuela while publicly claiming the reasons are drugs and democracy-spreading.  AI has fully taken hold and made it possible for the US economy to thrive while jobs and quality of life are suffering.  Boomer's mental and physical health has started to decline, but not before they fall prey to the trappings of social media, smart phones, and messaging from massive media conglomerates.  No longer do young people believe in the importance of college educations and "the American Dream" as costs have skyrocketed without any increase in value.  It's a strange time.  That's not to say there haven't been a lot of positives that have happened this year but it feels like those positives have been in the spirit of "hygge" in which small comforts are appreciated in resistance to unfavorable outside conditions.  I personally have felt that the progress I've enjoyed this year has been much more an internal understanding of self rather than an external advancement in career and financial position.  It's been hard to appreciate this invaluable progress at times, but as Katy and I say all the time... "We're doing it."

Here are some Highlights, Lowlights, and Other Events from 2025 in no particular order:

*Katy and I closed our company, The Ant & The Peony, after 3 years operating

*I stopped using Instagram!

*Jesse Kula aka Wits, one of my best friends, passed away

*Katy and I celebrated a fun birthday weekend in Baltimore

*I got heat stroke working a Tasker job in the scorching July heat

*I built stilts for an epic Halloween costume out of cardboard

*I sold my motorcycle

*Katy and I celebrated our anniversary in Rehoboth Beach

*Trump takes office for second term, despite citing an Insurrection at the end of his previous term

*I got 3 "nubs" removed from my head, and then shaved my head

*visited the Golds at the beach

*finally finished tree/4seasons mosaic!

*Katy gets diagnosed with autism + ADHD

*I bought a BMX bike and have begun practicing

*I tested a boxing gym, but ended up just buying a heavy bag (and promptly fucked up my bicep)

*ended therapy with Carolyn in April, began therapy with Vas in October

*Katy and I bought a new bed frame that has adjustable feet/head heights

*urban ex adventure with Colleen!

*made 2 squatty potty's with mosaic designs

*gave myself a stick-n-poke tattoo

*Cheese, our pet snail of 3 years, passed away

*Nashville visit for Beau Moore's 1st Birthday party!

*solo cabin trips in West Virginia and Poconos

*yurt weekend with Brett

*2 trips to Stonington

*I broke a water valve in a clients bathroom

*Home Electric 101 class through West Philly Tool Library

*2 trips to NC to visit Bobby

*Katy's Nana Jean passed away

*I built a shelter for outside cats in the neighborhood

*I finally began researching my ADHD, and have started making changes in my life!

*tried multiple times (unsuccessfully?) to connect with my Dad, began learning about emotionally immature parents

*started 'primal' bodyweight exercises

*finally started reading 'Confusing the Enemy'

*bought "house sneakers"

*got let go from 'Dog Job' after 3 shifts

*visited/volunteered at upcoming alternative community

*spray-painted parking spaces where the neighborhood needed them

*beat Stray, Death's Door, Arkham Asylum, Mario Kart 8, Mario Odyssey

I am the best version of myself I have ever been

I'm in the best shape of my life,

In the best relationship of my life,

In the best house I’ve ever lived in (as an adult),

Have a car for the first time,

A sweet motorcycle,

I’m handier than ever,

I making more art than ever before,

I know myself and have made so much progress,

I am the best version of myself I have ever been.

Skills list for post-apocalypse/current community building

 

Skills list for post-apocalypse/current community building

 

-cooking

-telling stories (to both adults and children)

-sports/athletics/fitness

-listening and getting people to better appreciate themselves/pump people up/social coaching

-carrying heavy stuff/doing gross stuff that needs to be done (I’m ok doing the dumb, ugly work)

-building custom designs and brainstorming ideas

-throwing a party/giving a speech/setting a mood/food & drink

-giving haircuts

-gardening/weeding/landscaping

-basic handyman shit

-drawing/illustration

-creative writing (but rarely upon prompting)

-leading a retreat

-style/fashion?

-fast/in good shape

-good at babysitting/fun uncle/camp counselor, but not full-time parent

-good caring for pets/animals

-creative/theatrical/musical/dance

-ok at writing

 

Bad With…

-numbers, details, exacts

-systems, structure, authority

-urgency, seriousness

Is This Enough? A plea.

I’m still thinking about doing a budget, but because I am friends with a few different mechanics I was able to get work done on the car for 10% of what another shop was asking!  10%, and I am adding a basket of our handmade bath salts, herbal teas, and aromatherapy pouches.

I am flossing regularly,

Meditating regularly,

In the best shape of my life

And play basketball in the park.

I’ve done volunteer work at Books Through Bars,

MANNA, soon I’ll be at Habitat for Humanity,

And about to begin donating food to community pantries and refridgerators.

Look at all the amazing reviews I have from satisfied clients on my Tasker profile.

I am in therapy working on issues in my life that make me feel like I am growing and making incredible progress.

I am also in couples therapy with Katy and feel similar about the steps we are making.

I meal plan,

I now use a day planner.

I take great care of 4 fantastic pets,

And manage a full backyard and garden in the warm season.

I shop almost entirely at Good Will,

And regularly engage with Buy Nothing groups.

I’ve attended civil rights protests and rallies,

And have tried to practice non-judgement for people with wildly different politics than me.

I shovel my neighbors sidewalks and front steps in the winter snow.

I visit my single and handicapped mother once a week to cook and clean and visit with her,

And try to see my Grandma a few times a year.  We are also pen pals.

I have a Godson who I make efforts to be part of his life.

I practice drawing and learning new artistic skills like mosaics and watercolor.

I’ve built custom furniture around the house for both Katy and I and the cats,

And try to proactively DIY small problems we experience around the house like clogged drains and drafty doors.

I read,

And am an active member of multiple writing groups.

I go for walks a few mornings a week,

And I subscribe to a service that sells perfectly good but slightly blemished produce that would’ve otherwise been thrown away.

I take the bus whenever possible and am always quick to offer my seat to anyone that looks like they could use it.

I make most of my food at home and try to eat balanced and healthy meals.

I try to limit my screentime, time on social media, and sensationalized news/media.

I try to talk to my inner child and “reparent myself”, and understand and accept all of my complex parts.

Hard Stuff Go Down Easy

 *submission for a "Tiny-Memoir" (<100 words) contest

Hard Stuff Go Down Easy

We move from a town in central Pennsylvania to glitzy Palm Beach Florida just before I enter high school, and I find the adjustment to be intoxicating.  Year One: I am stunned when, riding on skateboards, my friends buy us beer at a drive-through convenience store.  Year Two: I allow myself to be taught how to drink rum- good, añejo rum- overlooking a moonlit ocean on a private beach.  Year Three: I am granted a shot of someone’s parent’s Louis XVI Champagne Cognac- valued at about $100 per- and not caring for it much, help myself to a second.

Here Come's the Line

 

About a month ago I got my first cheesesteak in years.  For the past 5 years or so, the vast majority of the food I’ve eaten has been made at home.  I knew ‘Pat’s’ and ‘Gino’s’ steaks had gotten up to about $12 for a whiz wit + mushroom a few years ago, but was floored when I ordered the standard steak from Woodrow’s on South Street and they said “that will be $17.50”.  When the cashier waited expectantly for my payment I had this weird feeling of “not wanting to feel like a loser” if I scoffed at the cost and cancelled my order.  I watched as my arm extended my debit card feeling some type of absurd, surreal out-of-body experience.  To be fair, Woodrow’s makes a fantastic steak and it definitely scratched that “once-every-few-years” itch to celebrate a Philly staple, but I was conscious of the likelihood that this would be the last cheesesteak I ever ordered for myself which may have caused me to savor the grade D meat and cheese a little bit more than I would have otherwise.  This morning, a similar scenario happened at a local coffee shop. 

‘The Bakery’ opened up about a year ago on a corner a few blocks away from our place deep in South Philly.  Besides Dunkin Donuts it’s the only coffee shop for about 15 blocks or so.  I’d never been there before and have pretty much entirely eliminated caffeine from my diet except for tea and a DD coffee once every few months or so.  This morning I had the itch and Katy suggested I walk to The Bakery.  So I did and when the cashier told me “$8.50” for my ‘dirty chai’ (a cup of chai tea [which I watched the barista pour from a carton/wasn’t even homemade] plus a shot of espresso) I again watched in some out-of-body slow motion horror as my arm extended my payment.  I similarly felt like this very could be the last drink I ever order from a coffee shop, but this time the sentiment didn’t make it taste any better.  In fact, the feeling of being removed/disillusioned has kind of stuck with me as I’m finishing the last few sips here at home.

Sunday morning hyggge

 

It’s Sunday morning.

I feel good.  I feel focused.

My cats are happy and well-fed.

My house is clean.

The love of my life is enjoying a few extra hours in bed where the corduroy comforter and big, fluffy cat keep her warm from the late September morning breeze coming in from the curtained window.

I’ve just filled out my 2024 Presidential election ballot

Where I voted for Jill Stein/Green party for the first time,

And it feels like a declaration of independence from my own country.

Today I will tend the garden,

Go to the hardware store for supplies,

Build things around the house,

Make art and strive towards making it professional,

And tonight Katy will make dinner.

I’ve already meditated early this morning,

And plan on doing oil pulling, flossing, wearing my retainers, and working out in my home gym.

It’s a good life,

Yet war threatens from almost every side.