December Daily Writing Project: December 15

December 15-

A beginner’s guide to skipping out of work.

One of my old coworkers once said that the best way to skip out of work is to tell your boss that “I’m pissing out of my ass”, but that you’re only able to use that excuse just once.  And I agree with that.  Well, partially.

The main rule for skipping out of work is to stay original.  While my coworker’s excuse was gross, it’s strongest point is that it’s unique.  If you ever try using that excuse again, a red flag will surely be raised.  So, don’t be repetitive. 

Don’t regularly skip out, no matter what the excuse. 
Pretend that you did everything you could to come in, but it just didn’t work out.  
Butter the boss up first.  Maybe you did a great job on a project earlier that week, so you’re in high standing.  Maybe you and the boss went out for some beers and laughs the other day.  One good way to skip out is to first get the boss on your side so that they don’t immediately doubt your excuses.